Since this is a brand new blog, I thought my first post should give you a little background on me and my family. I think the only way to really do that is to post highlights of some of our actual conversations this year:
That one time we got to go on a date:
[Actual conversation on the patio at Whole Foods]
Me: Do you want the apple fritter or the carmelita? Hmm, that sounds like the name of a European call girl.
Paul: Apple Fritter?
Me: No, Carmelita. Apple Fritter sounds like the name of a trashy southern drag queen.
Paul: [husky southern drawl] My name is Apple Fritter and I want to thank y’all for coming on down here to see me at The Chicken Neck.
That time Paul tried to eat old food:
[Actual conversation in my kitchen]
Me: Is that plate of food from breakfast?
Paul: Yes, but it’s still good, I left it in the microwave.
Me: Umm, food still goes bad in there, the microwave does not stop the food from going bad. There is still air in there.
Paul: No, it’s sealed. Look, if it wasn’t there would be microwaves all up in your face every time you used it.
Me: Okay, I’m going to stop talking to you now.
That time our son realized I might be crazy:
[Actual conversation in our car]
Me (as we are driving past the library): Hey library, yes I know I have a book on hold, but I’m really tired. If you could just bring that to my house that would be great.
K: Are you talking to the library?
Me: [insane laughter] Umm, yeah.
K (as we drive past the gas station): Are you talking to the gas station now?
Paul: Great, now he thinks you’re insane.
And finally, just a typical morning chat with my husband about our future:
It’s a good life.
